Love at 37

Dear sis,

In my life I have loved over a dozen times. Some were great loves and some let’s just say infatuation. But all in all being loved and loving someone has always been a gift to me. The moment when you look at someone, whether they are sitting on the toilet, eating some food, giving you a massage or even snoring next to you. When you feel that feeling it really takes over you and sometimes you loose all sense. Like literally you spend all your money to make sure they are good, you lie to friends just to hang out with your love, you allow behaviors that you would probably never ignore. On the flip side, you have a built in best friend, someone to try new restaurants with, laugh, grow and build generational wealth.

My story of love has not always been a good one. The 1st I have ever thought I loved, cheated on me after 1 week of being girlfriend and boyfriend, when I was home sick with the flu. Second love decided I was not good enough to dance with at prom. So he decided to dance with his crush. Listen in the beginning of my life love came and went. But completely crushed you when it ended. This did not get better as I got older.

After wine getting poured on my head, cheating, abuse, rollercoaster relationships I had finally given up. My friend then told me she found her boyfriend on tinder. I was like girl bye. Ain’t no one going on tinder lol! But I caved, and immediately regretted it! Folks saying they loved my skin and want to lick it! Some took me on dates but wanted me to pay. Just a mess chile. I said ok god I got it! I got it! I’m done. I’ll wait for you to send him because this is tragic. As I went to delete the app, this nerdy looking dude came up and he had on a fedora and called himself a #girldad I was intrigued, so duhhhh I swiped right. Clicked out of the app and went my way. An hour later I received a message. “Hello, How are you?” This started a conversation that lasted all day. He asked me for my phone number and from that day on we have been talking everyday.

Saying I love you within 2 months of knowing each other, being vulnerable, open, setting boundaries, meeting kids, family, deep conversations and baby momma drama. All the ups and downs scared me, but apparently this is how adults healthy relationships should be. I had no idea. 6 months in we are still growing, acknowledging, building and flourishing. This is just the beginning.

Want to hear more, subscribe and grow with me!

-toodles